I’m trying to get a clear understanding of what being “committed” means in these days and times. A piece of paper will undoubtedly legalize the union but, theoretically, you both were still monogamous prior to the ceremony. You use this time as a testing period to see if this person can hold your interest...for life. Guidelines and boundaries are established early on in the relationship, even if they are subtle exchanges of information.
Often we solely say, “Yes we are together,” and just expect the other party to be on the same page; we expect them to act along the perimeters we deem feasible. So, I don’t have this down to a science, but thank God for my blog family because now I want us to create a list: GIRLFRIEND/BOYFRIEND rules vs. HUSBAND/WIFE rules.
But first tell me if you think the GIRLFRIEND/BOYFRIEND titles are juvenile since we are no longer girls and boys.
Here I’ll start:
I think I’d rather refer to my mate as my “man,” because a boy, he is not! On the other hand I think, to hell with the technicalities and I just want to conform to the norm. Saying “boyfriend” will cut to the chase: “yes that’s my dude, but we aren’t married, and we aren’t engaged.”
GIRLFRIEND/BOYFRIEND COMMITMENT GUIDELINE # 1:
Agree to an exclusive relationship
HUSBAND/WIFE COMMITMENT GUIDELINE # 1:
A formal commitment to an exclusive relationship
PLEASE ADD TO THIS SO WE CAN GET A GOOD LIST COMPILED AND FIND OUT ONCE AND FOR ALL IF THERE IS A DIFFERENCE IN WHAT'S EXPECTED AT THE START (GIRLFRIEND/BOYFRIEND) AND THE END (HUSBAND/WIFE) OF A RELATIONSHIP.
Thursday, January 22, 2009
Wednesday, January 14, 2009
Don't Date Women over 30!
"I had baggage but now I only take a carry on...I like to travel light" - Shelli Tinae
A friend of mine told me that he is "almost" done with women that are 30 and over (what I like to call 30 plussers). He says they have too much baggage weighing them down and that greatly lessens their potential for "wifie" status.
He went on to tell me that he took a 30 plusser on a date and he complimented her on her perfume; then he asked her the name of the fragrance. She refused to tell him. The woman later confessed that she didn't tell him because she didn't want him to go out and buy it for another woman so he could smell it on her.
He's "almost" done and trying to maintain his liberal stance on dating. This is just one of his experiences with 30 plussers and he's getting fed up. I had to ask him: "So at what age does a woman have less baggage?"
"24-27…my research has shown that that is the range of optimal performance for a woman..in all aspects..she's at her best and brightest," he said.
He professes that yes, there are exceptions to the rule but, nonetheless, he still has lumped women over 30 into a problematic category that includes anger, baggage, and insecurities.
I will say that, the older a woman get's the more experience she has when you meet her - and that can either be good or bad. In fact, it's both good and bad. These experiences have shaped her current existence and a lot of women have let those experiences dictate how they interact with the men they meet. Ladies, not only is this unfair to them, but it's also unfair to you. No one wants to be tried in a court of law for someone else's crime.
I don't want to dog his point of view because I do think it's valid. Generally speaking, we need to add all of those experiences (good and bad) up and look at them as one GRAND lesson. There is no need to look back and dwell on the past because it is nothing more but the sum of this present moment and in theory should make you a better person because you will have learned who to BE and who not to BE.
On the other hand, this is not about age because age is relative. A woman 24-27 years old may have fewer experiences but they could have been severelydamaging to her character.
Men, before you start complaining about women, you need to take a look in the mirror because, after all...you are who attract. If you see reoccurring problems in your life, there is a lesson you are missing. So in the end, it's not about the women over 30, it's about renewing YOUR-SELF so your experiences with women reflect your renewed sense of self.
A friend of mine told me that he is "almost" done with women that are 30 and over (what I like to call 30 plussers). He says they have too much baggage weighing them down and that greatly lessens their potential for "wifie" status.
He went on to tell me that he took a 30 plusser on a date and he complimented her on her perfume; then he asked her the name of the fragrance. She refused to tell him. The woman later confessed that she didn't tell him because she didn't want him to go out and buy it for another woman so he could smell it on her.
He's "almost" done and trying to maintain his liberal stance on dating. This is just one of his experiences with 30 plussers and he's getting fed up. I had to ask him: "So at what age does a woman have less baggage?"
"24-27…my research has shown that that is the range of optimal performance for a woman..in all aspects..she's at her best and brightest," he said.
He professes that yes, there are exceptions to the rule but, nonetheless, he still has lumped women over 30 into a problematic category that includes anger, baggage, and insecurities.
I will say that, the older a woman get's the more experience she has when you meet her - and that can either be good or bad. In fact, it's both good and bad. These experiences have shaped her current existence and a lot of women have let those experiences dictate how they interact with the men they meet. Ladies, not only is this unfair to them, but it's also unfair to you. No one wants to be tried in a court of law for someone else's crime.
I don't want to dog his point of view because I do think it's valid. Generally speaking, we need to add all of those experiences (good and bad) up and look at them as one GRAND lesson. There is no need to look back and dwell on the past because it is nothing more but the sum of this present moment and in theory should make you a better person because you will have learned who to BE and who not to BE.
On the other hand, this is not about age because age is relative. A woman 24-27 years old may have fewer experiences but they could have been severelydamaging to her character.
Men, before you start complaining about women, you need to take a look in the mirror because, after all...you are who attract. If you see reoccurring problems in your life, there is a lesson you are missing. So in the end, it's not about the women over 30, it's about renewing YOUR-SELF so your experiences with women reflect your renewed sense of self.
Thursday, January 8, 2009
2009 - THE YEAR OF TRUTH
We should never hesitate to say that we know the truth, because we do, for the realization of the unity of God and man is the truth. – Ernest Holmes
When you realize that GOD IS and works in and through you, lies cease to be an option because standing on the wings of truth, you realize it is your doorway to happiness; truth is the key that unlocks confusion in your heart. Your heart will ache if you allow lies the pleasure of acting as righteous.
All of our experiences are based on the nature of our thoughts and how we play them out in our lives. If we think truth – on a deep level – then we should voice that truth which will produce goodness in our lives. The truth resonates at a high frequency in your spirit and body and cannot be denied.
Thy word is true from the beginning and every one of thy righteous judgments endureth forever – Psalm 119:160
I think the big problem is acting on the truth that we instinctively and unequivocally know. Yes, the word is true from the beginning but we have free will to mask the truth under a veil of lies. The catch is…you will never be free under that veil because you can’t see where you are and you definitely can’t see where you are heading if lies are your guide.
Nothing but goodness can come from the truth and there’s a sense of ease that comes with it - a sense of relief. In our youth we learned to lie to keep secrets of wrongdoing and to avoid punishment. That is hard to outgrow because even adults fear being punished and I think the biggest thing adults are scared of is being judged. People are going to view you from their own perspective no matter what so you may as well be viewed authentically. Only the truth will ensure you are surrounded by people of the same nature, thus eliminating the fear of punishment and judgment.
No more white lies; no more telling half but not all of the truth; no more concocting detailed lies in our mind so we can act them out later on the stage of illusion; no more fearing the truth will cripple us, when it fact, it will set us free.
Let’s start the NEW year with a NEW reason to be truthful; because without truth we stay in a vicious cycle of lies thus limiting our spiritual growth. Lies are to darkness what truth is to light. Stand in the light of truth and not in the darkness of your lies. Don’t lie to yourself because that’s where all thoughts begin and don’t perpetuate those lies by speaking them into existence.
HAPPY NEW YEAR AND MAY THE TRUTH BE YOU….ALWAYS
When you realize that GOD IS and works in and through you, lies cease to be an option because standing on the wings of truth, you realize it is your doorway to happiness; truth is the key that unlocks confusion in your heart. Your heart will ache if you allow lies the pleasure of acting as righteous.
All of our experiences are based on the nature of our thoughts and how we play them out in our lives. If we think truth – on a deep level – then we should voice that truth which will produce goodness in our lives. The truth resonates at a high frequency in your spirit and body and cannot be denied.
Thy word is true from the beginning and every one of thy righteous judgments endureth forever – Psalm 119:160
I think the big problem is acting on the truth that we instinctively and unequivocally know. Yes, the word is true from the beginning but we have free will to mask the truth under a veil of lies. The catch is…you will never be free under that veil because you can’t see where you are and you definitely can’t see where you are heading if lies are your guide.
Nothing but goodness can come from the truth and there’s a sense of ease that comes with it - a sense of relief. In our youth we learned to lie to keep secrets of wrongdoing and to avoid punishment. That is hard to outgrow because even adults fear being punished and I think the biggest thing adults are scared of is being judged. People are going to view you from their own perspective no matter what so you may as well be viewed authentically. Only the truth will ensure you are surrounded by people of the same nature, thus eliminating the fear of punishment and judgment.
No more white lies; no more telling half but not all of the truth; no more concocting detailed lies in our mind so we can act them out later on the stage of illusion; no more fearing the truth will cripple us, when it fact, it will set us free.
Let’s start the NEW year with a NEW reason to be truthful; because without truth we stay in a vicious cycle of lies thus limiting our spiritual growth. Lies are to darkness what truth is to light. Stand in the light of truth and not in the darkness of your lies. Don’t lie to yourself because that’s where all thoughts begin and don’t perpetuate those lies by speaking them into existence.
HAPPY NEW YEAR AND MAY THE TRUTH BE YOU….ALWAYS
Wednesday, December 17, 2008
LOVE CONSCIOUSLY
We have to Love consciously from now on and not unconsciously.
I'm sure most of you have experienced this, but it's like we drive from the mall to our home and we don't know how we got there. We do most of our thinking unconsciously - not knowing how we got from point A to point B. The heart works in the same way but by the time it gets to point B, the unconscious thoughts on its travel affect how SWEET home will be when you arrive.
The heart only knows to LOVE and it knows no discretion. It's time to follow the movement of our hearts with our thoughts...consciously.
I've had Love where my thoughts of it stemmed from an unconscious fear of Love's perfection. My unconscious made limiting decisions on the infinite ecstasy of Love. If I were Loving consciously and with conscious positive thought, then nothing would have stopped my desires from manifesting with this man. God wants all of our dreams to come true; we just have to believe that our dreams are real and not figments of our imagination. Heaven is here on Earth as God permeates in and through all things.
Love is "perfect" but having unconscious thoughts of it can taint it because we tend to have NEGATIVE unconscious thoughts because they stem from our memories of the past. Memories of past Love can bring about doubt, fear, and confusion.
If we begin to have conscious thoughts of Love then we can supervise their authenticity and validate them with feelings of happiness and assurance that Love is perfect - just as God intended. If negative feelings arise say, "God is Love and Love is flowing through me as I give it and receive it abundantly."
Unconscious Love does not care about the illusions. In fact, it actually magnifies the illusions in our minds and creates fairytale versions of reality. Say love affirmations to erase and correct them.
Conscious love will stem from thoughts that your spirit has ordained and it won't rob you of energy, but instead you will gain strength from the positive reinforcements of your thoughts once you have trained them to remain positively centered.
I'm sure most of you have experienced this, but it's like we drive from the mall to our home and we don't know how we got there. We do most of our thinking unconsciously - not knowing how we got from point A to point B. The heart works in the same way but by the time it gets to point B, the unconscious thoughts on its travel affect how SWEET home will be when you arrive.
The heart only knows to LOVE and it knows no discretion. It's time to follow the movement of our hearts with our thoughts...consciously.
I've had Love where my thoughts of it stemmed from an unconscious fear of Love's perfection. My unconscious made limiting decisions on the infinite ecstasy of Love. If I were Loving consciously and with conscious positive thought, then nothing would have stopped my desires from manifesting with this man. God wants all of our dreams to come true; we just have to believe that our dreams are real and not figments of our imagination. Heaven is here on Earth as God permeates in and through all things.
Love is "perfect" but having unconscious thoughts of it can taint it because we tend to have NEGATIVE unconscious thoughts because they stem from our memories of the past. Memories of past Love can bring about doubt, fear, and confusion.
If we begin to have conscious thoughts of Love then we can supervise their authenticity and validate them with feelings of happiness and assurance that Love is perfect - just as God intended. If negative feelings arise say, "God is Love and Love is flowing through me as I give it and receive it abundantly."
Unconscious Love does not care about the illusions. In fact, it actually magnifies the illusions in our minds and creates fairytale versions of reality. Say love affirmations to erase and correct them.
Conscious love will stem from thoughts that your spirit has ordained and it won't rob you of energy, but instead you will gain strength from the positive reinforcements of your thoughts once you have trained them to remain positively centered.
Wednesday, December 3, 2008
Find the Time to Honor Yourself
My visions are unfolding almost faster then I can create them. I see clearly my destiny as it spirals in control and aligns my life with purpose.
I am usually really good with taking time to honor myself in prayer, yoga and meditation but lately, on the edge of literally speaking, it seems the days run into each other and it's a month long day. The times I honor myself are coming far, few and in between. I don't want to forget my divine purpose is spiritually based and my body is a merely a fulfilment vehicle.
So needless to say, business is running smoothly and we are getting a lot done. To give myself balance and continue the flow of my purpose I'm going to FIND time to honor...me. This business is allowing my creative juices to pour our so in that sense, yes, I am honoring the creator, my God. I just have to remember to anty-up and reconnect with my soul-self that governs my existence.
Marcia & Joseph gave me some bath crystals and I can't wait to honor myself with a luxurious warm bath. There are so many ways you can honor yourself and it doesn't have to take all day. Any exercise, reading a book, sitting alone for a few minutes, lighting your favorite incense (mine is nag champa) - or really anything that kicks one of the senses into high gear. And believe it or not, just a few deep breaths can help center you and allow your body to release stale air in your lunges while breathing new air into the cells in your body.
Discover ways to honor yourself if not daily, then definitely weekly.
Marcia & Joseph gave me some bath crystals and I can't wait to honor myself with a luxurious warm bath. There are so many ways you can honor yourself and it doesn't have to take all day. Any exercise, reading a book, sitting alone for a few minutes, lighting your favorite incense (mine is nag champa) - or really anything that kicks one of the senses into high gear. And believe it or not, just a few deep breaths can help center you and allow your body to release stale air in your lunges while breathing new air into the cells in your body.
Discover ways to honor yourself if not daily, then definitely weekly.
Thursday, November 6, 2008
MAKE LOVE WITH ME...NOT TO ME
I've often wondered where the term "make Love" came from. People, especially women, always want someone to "make Love" to them. This thought just popped in my head the other day: THE ONLY WAY TO "MAKE LOVE" IS TO MAKE A BABY. Maybe the root desire for men and women to want to "make Love" is because instinctively they are ready to procreate. It's an animalistic desire we're all born with; the need to leave a legacy.
Follow me for a second. I believe God is Love and Love is God and as a child of Love and God, I am incarnated and created in the likeness of Love and God. So the only way for me to "make Love" is for the semen of a man to fertilize one of my eggs. The initial contact of the two is a cosmic divine creation and the only way the two of us can"make Love".
Now love can be shared and I would never deny that. Depending on the energy between the two people, I believe a man and woman can have sex and can actually EXPRESS and EXTEND Love but Love was made the day you were born. People need to know that sex and making Love are not one and the same; you can have meaningless sex, sex with extensions of Love, or sex that leads you to make Love by way of producing a child.
There are a lot of people making babies but not realizing they are "making Love" ordained by the most high. All human being on this Earth are perfect and in the likeness of God and Love. We are born with the ability to create an abundance of any and everything we could ever dream of because we ARE Love...we are God.
A MAN OF LOVE
PLUS
A WOMAN OF LOVE
PLUS
THE DISCOVERY (OR REMEMBERANCE) THAT THEY ARE SOULMATES
EQUALS
THE BIRTH OF THE MOST SUPREME BEINGS
“Make love” with one you LOVE.
Follow me for a second. I believe God is Love and Love is God and as a child of Love and God, I am incarnated and created in the likeness of Love and God. So the only way for me to "make Love" is for the semen of a man to fertilize one of my eggs. The initial contact of the two is a cosmic divine creation and the only way the two of us can"make Love".
Now love can be shared and I would never deny that. Depending on the energy between the two people, I believe a man and woman can have sex and can actually EXPRESS and EXTEND Love but Love was made the day you were born. People need to know that sex and making Love are not one and the same; you can have meaningless sex, sex with extensions of Love, or sex that leads you to make Love by way of producing a child.
There are a lot of people making babies but not realizing they are "making Love" ordained by the most high. All human being on this Earth are perfect and in the likeness of God and Love. We are born with the ability to create an abundance of any and everything we could ever dream of because we ARE Love...we are God.
A MAN OF LOVE
PLUS
A WOMAN OF LOVE
PLUS
THE DISCOVERY (OR REMEMBERANCE) THAT THEY ARE SOULMATES
EQUALS
THE BIRTH OF THE MOST SUPREME BEINGS
“Make love” with one you LOVE.
Wednesday, November 5, 2008
IT'S ABOUT MORE THEN VOTING!
I wasn’t going to vote…
…and God, divine Creator, please forgive me for feeling hopeless when the reality is, thought consciousness can change millions of people in the twinkle of an eye and uplift our souls everlasting. You know what? I’m going to eliminate the word hope from my vocabulary because to feel hope is to have expectations and expectations are rooted from your past on the way you think things should turn not and not necessarily how they should turn out. Now, let’s examine the feeling of being hopeless. You can only feel hopeless when the things you hoped for – which are rooted in your past expectations – fail. Expectations lead to hoping and hoping can lead to despair. Let’s BE faith! We don’t need hopeful expectations; we get confirmations from God to show our faith has a foundation of LOVE and PEACE. Love on you ideas and aspirations, don’t hope for them because that implies there is a sense of doubt. Send them love and God will manifest your dreams right before your very eyes.
I had given up on our government and as I mentioned earlier, really had no solid plans to vote. It was a fleeting thought that would reappear occasionally. Actually, I only voted because my mother was really adamant about it and I didn’t want to disappoint her. I still think our government is corrupt and in the interest of big corporations and millionaire bureaucrats but a historic event was in order to change us ALL individually so that we can change the world collectively – and that event was the elect of Senator Barack Obama as the 44th president of the United States of America. The world watched, the world rejoiced, the world gained faith.
I am transformed from a conspiracy theorist to an energy theorist.
And it’s not because Obama won; he has been predicted to win for quite some time, but it was the shift in energy consciousness around the world that I felt, saw and heard. People, there was a shift in energy consciousness last night. I had to repeat it because the depths of that needs to be relished in the hearts of everyone. We may not get a new government system but if we become new in our own right – we affect those around us and that in turn will redirect ideas and actions. You may have noticed that the top of my blog page says, “Thought travels faster then light. We are all one on different missions, nonetheless, but reaching for the same star in the sky that connects us to the Source.”
WE CHANGE OUR THOUGHTS, WE CHANGE THE WORLD.
Now I want to share with you some pictures from our grand celebration last night. You had to be there to understand the full experience but I have faith you’ll feel the energy just from the pictures alone. People where celebrating on the streets onf downtown Atlanta til the wee hours of the morning.
…and God, divine Creator, please forgive me for feeling hopeless when the reality is, thought consciousness can change millions of people in the twinkle of an eye and uplift our souls everlasting. You know what? I’m going to eliminate the word hope from my vocabulary because to feel hope is to have expectations and expectations are rooted from your past on the way you think things should turn not and not necessarily how they should turn out. Now, let’s examine the feeling of being hopeless. You can only feel hopeless when the things you hoped for – which are rooted in your past expectations – fail. Expectations lead to hoping and hoping can lead to despair. Let’s BE faith! We don’t need hopeful expectations; we get confirmations from God to show our faith has a foundation of LOVE and PEACE. Love on you ideas and aspirations, don’t hope for them because that implies there is a sense of doubt. Send them love and God will manifest your dreams right before your very eyes.
I had given up on our government and as I mentioned earlier, really had no solid plans to vote. It was a fleeting thought that would reappear occasionally. Actually, I only voted because my mother was really adamant about it and I didn’t want to disappoint her. I still think our government is corrupt and in the interest of big corporations and millionaire bureaucrats but a historic event was in order to change us ALL individually so that we can change the world collectively – and that event was the elect of Senator Barack Obama as the 44th president of the United States of America. The world watched, the world rejoiced, the world gained faith.
I am transformed from a conspiracy theorist to an energy theorist.
And it’s not because Obama won; he has been predicted to win for quite some time, but it was the shift in energy consciousness around the world that I felt, saw and heard. People, there was a shift in energy consciousness last night. I had to repeat it because the depths of that needs to be relished in the hearts of everyone. We may not get a new government system but if we become new in our own right – we affect those around us and that in turn will redirect ideas and actions. You may have noticed that the top of my blog page says, “Thought travels faster then light. We are all one on different missions, nonetheless, but reaching for the same star in the sky that connects us to the Source.”
WE CHANGE OUR THOUGHTS, WE CHANGE THE WORLD.
Now I want to share with you some pictures from our grand celebration last night. You had to be there to understand the full experience but I have faith you’ll feel the energy just from the pictures alone. People where celebrating on the streets onf downtown Atlanta til the wee hours of the morning.
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