One of my younger girlfriends said to me, “you don’t look 30." She was kind and matter of fact but my response to her was, “I don’t look 30, but I feel 30, in terms of my growth as a woman.”
Age is not about the growing number of candles I have to blow out on your birthday cakes; it’s not those stubborn grey hairs because I’ve had those since I was 19; it’s not about my physique because a fitness test revealed I’m in the shape of an 18-year-old woman; it’s not about my not-so-great eye sight, considering I’ve been wearing eye glasses since grade school.
Age, rather, is a timeline for WISDOM.
I’m going to wear “30” like a badge of honor because I have grown a lot to get to this point. I haven’t grown in height, I think an inch shy of 6 feet is where I’ll remain, but I’ve grown to see my place in this nonsensical world. When you can make sense out of nothing, you’re really growing and learning that nothing is everything at the same time.
My age means patience and with patience comes understanding. Yes, the compensation for patience is understanding. In my youth everything was rush-rush, which left no time to process the experience. So I spent a lot of time repeating the past, trying to catch up to the lesson, which can be easily missed when you’re young and careless.
The journey to 30 has meant learning to forgive myself for the emotional dead weight I’ve carried around for way too long. Everything begins and ends with the nakedness of my mind and soul, so I’m exposed for the first time and what I’ve found is love and happiness.
I work on ME everyday and I still have my “off” days but those moments are growing shorter and shorter.
They say that 30 is hardest year of your life so I’m hoping that I’ve begun to plan for the unforeseen circumstances associated with this time period.
Astrologically, Saturn returns to the same place it was when you were born, your “Saturn Return.” Saturn, being the planet of growth, is the reason why so many people have a volatile time aaround the ages of 29 - 30. It forces change in your life in order to promote growth and this force can not be denied or ignored. Whether you believe this to be the reason or not, I’m sure you can attest to this time being marked by times of upheaval. I can honestly say I’m training myself to embrace this metamorphosis as I cyclically shed skins of the past and breathe life into my renewed spirit. I will prevail and weather the storms of change.
Do you remember 30? What advice would you give to me or others about to join the “30 and over club?"
SHARE YOUR MIND WITH ME.
In light and happiness,
Shelli Tinae
