The Authentic Side of Me

I have been that girl who tried too hard to get a man, thinking this is what will please him - but I lost myself in the meantime because I was afraid to show him who I really was. Now I realize, if he doesn't know who I am, then he'll never be mine anyway. There would always be some obstacle inhibiting our growth because of the false portrayals of the real ME. Trying to keep up an ideal image was a disservice to myself...it was a disservice to the man I was desperately trying to impress. I was trying to be so perfect, that it made me imperfect. My experiences have taught me to cut to the chase and expose my true self without fear of rejection. I look at the men I date as a potential friend - not a potential husband. It takes the pressure off the entire situation.

Often we try too hard - especially if the person meets our "fantasy island" criteria. Then we get mentally obsessed with meeting all of his requirements. "I am good enough, see!" Being your authentic self on a date doesn't mean exposing your entire background on a first date, but it does mean feeling comfortable enough not to embellish the truth.The real person will come out eventually so you may as well be seen for who you are in the beginning of the friendship/relationship. You don't need a representative to stand in the place of the real you because once you show your true light, you risk the chance of being judged as fake. A lot of people have their guard up but those are the people who will miss out on meaningful relationships.

I don't think people always intend to cover up the truth, some of them are just surface level people. Trying to break down those walls and get them to open up is a b**ch but I think that's also associated with fear. They will never let you in because they still haven't come to accept who they are. We definitely need someone who accepts their past and is not afraid to communicate it. When you see your growth - the past is not shameful.

So once again things start right where they began...with yourself. When you lovingly accept your authentic self you can share that essence with everyone you meet.