I just want to have a candid conversation about circumcision.
I know I’m not a guy and the only thing severed from me at birth was the umbilical cord, but I may give birth to a son one day so the thought has crossed my mind: will I get my new born circumcised? It is becoming less common for parents to have this procedure done but it’s so taboo that people don’t share this information, probably in fear of ridicule.
I believe circumcision was more for population control more than a religious right. Men already like to have sex like jack rabbits, so imagine ALL men running around with the nerve endings on their penis in tack. LAWD HAVE MERCY! LOL On the flip side, ladies, how would you feel if your clitorises was partially severed at birth? I am not one to believe the hype just because it was handed down from generation to generation. Are we here to think intuitively or regurgitate pseudo information? Anyway, once it’s done, it’s done and there’s no, uh, growing it back.
When I was a sophomore in college I read an article in the Men’s Health Magazine and it was the account of several men who decided to get circumcised as adults and all of them were very disappointed after the surgery. Their main complaint was in regards to sex; it just didn’t feel the same. The foreskin of the penis has a lot of nerves that intensifies the feeling during sex – but really that is the natural feeling and the circumcised feeling is unnatural right? The American Academy of Pediatrics have taken a stance…well sort of, they now neither discourage nor recommend the procedure. My bet is they don’t discourage it because it’s profitable and they don’t recommend it because they can’t validate its benefits.
The article ‘Should all Males be Circumcised?’ on menshealth.com states, “The founder of the National Organization of Circumcision Information Resource Centers (NOCIRC -- get it?) first witnessed the procedure in 1979 while training for her nurse's degree. The unlucky baby, she later wrote, was ‘strapped spread-eagle to a plastic board... struggling against his restraints -- tugging, whimpering, and then crying helplessly" while awaiting the knife. Then as the doctor, using no anesthesia, began cutting into the penis with a scalpel, "the baby began to gasp and choke, breathless from his shrill continuous screams...’
Even though the pain is evident, I can hear some women saying, “I hear an uncircumcised penis is unhealthy or it looks funny.” First of all, if a man is not hygienic, it has nothing to do with the foreskin of his penis, he’s just nasty. Secondly, if it’s funny looking before the snip, it probably will be after.
I’m definitely not telling people what to do but I would like to open up some dialogue. Let’s have a modern conversation on an ancient procedure.
I would love to hear from men who are circumcised and from those that are not. It’s definitely nothing to be ashamed of, afterall, God made us perfect. And ladies, let me know your take on uncircumcised penises. Do you have a preference? Do you have circumcised children? Any regrets or concerns?
------------------------
Here are some links and information I found:
Did you circumcise your baby boy?
yes (10,712)
40%
no (15,875)
59%
Total Votes: 26,587
(survey on about.com)
‘Circumcision!’ - http://dherbs.com/articles/circumcision-258.html
‘Care of an intact Penis’ http://pediatrics.about.com/gi/dynamic/offsite.htm?zi=1/XJ&sdn=pediatrics&cdn=health&tm=1065&gps=539_471_1020_431&f=00&su=p284.9.336.ip_p726.5.336.ip_&tt=2&bt=0&bts=0&zu=http%3A//www.cirp.org/pages/parents/peron1/
‘Doctors Opposing Circumcision’ - http://www.doctorsopposingcircumcision.org/
Journal of the American Medical Association, ‘Circumcision in the United States’ - http://www.cirp.org/library/general/laumann/
Men’s Health, ‘Should All Males be Circumcised?’ - http://www.menshealth.com/cda/article.do?site=MensHealth&channel=health&category=other.diseases.ailments&conitem=6a8cd36265f1f110VgnVCM10000013281eac____
Wednesday, February 25, 2009
Wednesday, February 18, 2009
I SHOT A GUN...AND I LIKED IT!
I went to a gun range and I was so scared I was almost shaking. There was a rainfall of gun shells hitting me on my head from the guy at my right and the guy at my left. I put on my gun range armor; ear and eye protectors, a mean mug, and then I got in my stance. All the while I was thinking, “What the hell am I doing here?” Side note: ladies this can make a hot date. It’s not so bad to have a handsome man lightly grip your waist as he shows you the proper shooting techniques.
So the instructions from my friend were simple: point, aim and shoot for the target. I was already warned that I would either love or hate shooting and I would know immediately after the first shot.
BOOM!
The sound of the gun echoed throughout my entire body. The lead sprays so fast that the gun gives a “kick back,” so you really have to hold the gun steady. I fired a round and I was feeling really proud of myself. We pulled up the target to see how I did…nothing. I hit everything but the target. No, I’m serious. I actually hit the clip that the target was attached to. I could see that being an expert on these things would take a lot of practice but I immediately discovered…I LIKED IT.
Okay, so I was shooting a .357 revolver because the gun shop owner recommends them for women, as his wife and daughter have made that their gun of choice and they carry them in their purses (and guys thought we just carried lipstick and feminine products). He said they like the revolver because you basically just point and shoot. Ladies, if you’re ever in danger, the last thing you want to think about is loading a clip and cocking the gun. So I was sold on test driving the revolver for that reason and also because they don’t jam like a semi-automatic gun has the chance of doing. I was seriously thrown into gun 101 class but I was definitely enjoying the lessons.
My friends bought guns that day and I left there with information on the gun I wanted plus the laser grip I fell in love with. I had the application for gun registration, too. I was totally ready to make a purchase but something hit me: if I buy a gun, damn, there is a chance I might use it one day and let me tell you, that is a scary thought.
So, I was straddling the fence but I did make a decision, but first I would love to hear how the women feel about carrying a gun. Do you have one, ladies? Also, how do the fellas feel about their women being equipped to shoot a firearm?
So the instructions from my friend were simple: point, aim and shoot for the target. I was already warned that I would either love or hate shooting and I would know immediately after the first shot.
BOOM!
The sound of the gun echoed throughout my entire body. The lead sprays so fast that the gun gives a “kick back,” so you really have to hold the gun steady. I fired a round and I was feeling really proud of myself. We pulled up the target to see how I did…nothing. I hit everything but the target. No, I’m serious. I actually hit the clip that the target was attached to. I could see that being an expert on these things would take a lot of practice but I immediately discovered…I LIKED IT.
Okay, so I was shooting a .357 revolver because the gun shop owner recommends them for women, as his wife and daughter have made that their gun of choice and they carry them in their purses (and guys thought we just carried lipstick and feminine products). He said they like the revolver because you basically just point and shoot. Ladies, if you’re ever in danger, the last thing you want to think about is loading a clip and cocking the gun. So I was sold on test driving the revolver for that reason and also because they don’t jam like a semi-automatic gun has the chance of doing. I was seriously thrown into gun 101 class but I was definitely enjoying the lessons.
My friends bought guns that day and I left there with information on the gun I wanted plus the laser grip I fell in love with. I had the application for gun registration, too. I was totally ready to make a purchase but something hit me: if I buy a gun, damn, there is a chance I might use it one day and let me tell you, that is a scary thought.
So, I was straddling the fence but I did make a decision, but first I would love to hear how the women feel about carrying a gun. Do you have one, ladies? Also, how do the fellas feel about their women being equipped to shoot a firearm?
Tuesday, January 27, 2009
COMMITMENT GUIDELINES
GIRLFRIEND/BOYFRIEND COMMITMENT GUIDELINES:
-Focus on growing your FRIENDSHIP
-Agree to an EXCLUSIVE relationship
-Titles (boyfriend, girlfriend, partner, etc) are OPTIONAL, based on the couple
-Commit to the person for who they are right now, and not who you think they can POTENTIALLY be
-Set BOUNDARIES that both partners agree on
-BE REAL – so your friendship can reflect that. Be you from the jump!
-LOVE IS NOT ENOUGH – so if it’s too much work, you have the option to walk away
HUSBAND/WIFE COMMITMENT GUIDELINES:
-Marry your BEST FRIEND
-A formal commitment to an EXCLUSIVE relationship
-Titles ARE NOT OPTIONAL
-Eliminated the POTENTIALS and determined this person (good and bad) is who I want, raw and uncensored
-Set BOUNDARIES that both partners agree on (could be same from before marriage)
-Continue to BE REAL so your marriage will be based in truth
-LOVE IS NOT ENOUGH – it takes hard work but don’t make quitting an option
Thursday, January 22, 2009
My man, yes...but a husband you are not!
I’m trying to get a clear understanding of what being “committed” means in these days and times. A piece of paper will undoubtedly legalize the union but, theoretically, you both were still monogamous prior to the ceremony. You use this time as a testing period to see if this person can hold your interest...for life. Guidelines and boundaries are established early on in the relationship, even if they are subtle exchanges of information.
Often we solely say, “Yes we are together,” and just expect the other party to be on the same page; we expect them to act along the perimeters we deem feasible. So, I don’t have this down to a science, but thank God for my blog family because now I want us to create a list: GIRLFRIEND/BOYFRIEND rules vs. HUSBAND/WIFE rules.
But first tell me if you think the GIRLFRIEND/BOYFRIEND titles are juvenile since we are no longer girls and boys.
Here I’ll start:
I think I’d rather refer to my mate as my “man,” because a boy, he is not! On the other hand I think, to hell with the technicalities and I just want to conform to the norm. Saying “boyfriend” will cut to the chase: “yes that’s my dude, but we aren’t married, and we aren’t engaged.”
GIRLFRIEND/BOYFRIEND COMMITMENT GUIDELINE # 1:
Agree to an exclusive relationship
HUSBAND/WIFE COMMITMENT GUIDELINE # 1:
A formal commitment to an exclusive relationship
PLEASE ADD TO THIS SO WE CAN GET A GOOD LIST COMPILED AND FIND OUT ONCE AND FOR ALL IF THERE IS A DIFFERENCE IN WHAT'S EXPECTED AT THE START (GIRLFRIEND/BOYFRIEND) AND THE END (HUSBAND/WIFE) OF A RELATIONSHIP.
Often we solely say, “Yes we are together,” and just expect the other party to be on the same page; we expect them to act along the perimeters we deem feasible. So, I don’t have this down to a science, but thank God for my blog family because now I want us to create a list: GIRLFRIEND/BOYFRIEND rules vs. HUSBAND/WIFE rules.
But first tell me if you think the GIRLFRIEND/BOYFRIEND titles are juvenile since we are no longer girls and boys.
Here I’ll start:
I think I’d rather refer to my mate as my “man,” because a boy, he is not! On the other hand I think, to hell with the technicalities and I just want to conform to the norm. Saying “boyfriend” will cut to the chase: “yes that’s my dude, but we aren’t married, and we aren’t engaged.”
GIRLFRIEND/BOYFRIEND COMMITMENT GUIDELINE # 1:
Agree to an exclusive relationship
HUSBAND/WIFE COMMITMENT GUIDELINE # 1:
A formal commitment to an exclusive relationship
PLEASE ADD TO THIS SO WE CAN GET A GOOD LIST COMPILED AND FIND OUT ONCE AND FOR ALL IF THERE IS A DIFFERENCE IN WHAT'S EXPECTED AT THE START (GIRLFRIEND/BOYFRIEND) AND THE END (HUSBAND/WIFE) OF A RELATIONSHIP.
Wednesday, January 14, 2009
Don't Date Women over 30!
"I had baggage but now I only take a carry on...I like to travel light" - Shelli Tinae
A friend of mine told me that he is "almost" done with women that are 30 and over (what I like to call 30 plussers). He says they have too much baggage weighing them down and that greatly lessens their potential for "wifie" status.
He went on to tell me that he took a 30 plusser on a date and he complimented her on her perfume; then he asked her the name of the fragrance. She refused to tell him. The woman later confessed that she didn't tell him because she didn't want him to go out and buy it for another woman so he could smell it on her.
He's "almost" done and trying to maintain his liberal stance on dating. This is just one of his experiences with 30 plussers and he's getting fed up. I had to ask him: "So at what age does a woman have less baggage?"
"24-27…my research has shown that that is the range of optimal performance for a woman..in all aspects..she's at her best and brightest," he said.
He professes that yes, there are exceptions to the rule but, nonetheless, he still has lumped women over 30 into a problematic category that includes anger, baggage, and insecurities.
I will say that, the older a woman get's the more experience she has when you meet her - and that can either be good or bad. In fact, it's both good and bad. These experiences have shaped her current existence and a lot of women have let those experiences dictate how they interact with the men they meet. Ladies, not only is this unfair to them, but it's also unfair to you. No one wants to be tried in a court of law for someone else's crime.
I don't want to dog his point of view because I do think it's valid. Generally speaking, we need to add all of those experiences (good and bad) up and look at them as one GRAND lesson. There is no need to look back and dwell on the past because it is nothing more but the sum of this present moment and in theory should make you a better person because you will have learned who to BE and who not to BE.
On the other hand, this is not about age because age is relative. A woman 24-27 years old may have fewer experiences but they could have been severelydamaging to her character.
Men, before you start complaining about women, you need to take a look in the mirror because, after all...you are who attract. If you see reoccurring problems in your life, there is a lesson you are missing. So in the end, it's not about the women over 30, it's about renewing YOUR-SELF so your experiences with women reflect your renewed sense of self.
A friend of mine told me that he is "almost" done with women that are 30 and over (what I like to call 30 plussers). He says they have too much baggage weighing them down and that greatly lessens their potential for "wifie" status.
He went on to tell me that he took a 30 plusser on a date and he complimented her on her perfume; then he asked her the name of the fragrance. She refused to tell him. The woman later confessed that she didn't tell him because she didn't want him to go out and buy it for another woman so he could smell it on her.
He's "almost" done and trying to maintain his liberal stance on dating. This is just one of his experiences with 30 plussers and he's getting fed up. I had to ask him: "So at what age does a woman have less baggage?"
"24-27…my research has shown that that is the range of optimal performance for a woman..in all aspects..she's at her best and brightest," he said.
He professes that yes, there are exceptions to the rule but, nonetheless, he still has lumped women over 30 into a problematic category that includes anger, baggage, and insecurities.
I will say that, the older a woman get's the more experience she has when you meet her - and that can either be good or bad. In fact, it's both good and bad. These experiences have shaped her current existence and a lot of women have let those experiences dictate how they interact with the men they meet. Ladies, not only is this unfair to them, but it's also unfair to you. No one wants to be tried in a court of law for someone else's crime.
I don't want to dog his point of view because I do think it's valid. Generally speaking, we need to add all of those experiences (good and bad) up and look at them as one GRAND lesson. There is no need to look back and dwell on the past because it is nothing more but the sum of this present moment and in theory should make you a better person because you will have learned who to BE and who not to BE.
On the other hand, this is not about age because age is relative. A woman 24-27 years old may have fewer experiences but they could have been severelydamaging to her character.
Men, before you start complaining about women, you need to take a look in the mirror because, after all...you are who attract. If you see reoccurring problems in your life, there is a lesson you are missing. So in the end, it's not about the women over 30, it's about renewing YOUR-SELF so your experiences with women reflect your renewed sense of self.
Thursday, January 8, 2009
2009 - THE YEAR OF TRUTH
We should never hesitate to say that we know the truth, because we do, for the realization of the unity of God and man is the truth. – Ernest Holmes
When you realize that GOD IS and works in and through you, lies cease to be an option because standing on the wings of truth, you realize it is your doorway to happiness; truth is the key that unlocks confusion in your heart. Your heart will ache if you allow lies the pleasure of acting as righteous.
All of our experiences are based on the nature of our thoughts and how we play them out in our lives. If we think truth – on a deep level – then we should voice that truth which will produce goodness in our lives. The truth resonates at a high frequency in your spirit and body and cannot be denied.
Thy word is true from the beginning and every one of thy righteous judgments endureth forever – Psalm 119:160
I think the big problem is acting on the truth that we instinctively and unequivocally know. Yes, the word is true from the beginning but we have free will to mask the truth under a veil of lies. The catch is…you will never be free under that veil because you can’t see where you are and you definitely can’t see where you are heading if lies are your guide.
Nothing but goodness can come from the truth and there’s a sense of ease that comes with it - a sense of relief. In our youth we learned to lie to keep secrets of wrongdoing and to avoid punishment. That is hard to outgrow because even adults fear being punished and I think the biggest thing adults are scared of is being judged. People are going to view you from their own perspective no matter what so you may as well be viewed authentically. Only the truth will ensure you are surrounded by people of the same nature, thus eliminating the fear of punishment and judgment.
No more white lies; no more telling half but not all of the truth; no more concocting detailed lies in our mind so we can act them out later on the stage of illusion; no more fearing the truth will cripple us, when it fact, it will set us free.
Let’s start the NEW year with a NEW reason to be truthful; because without truth we stay in a vicious cycle of lies thus limiting our spiritual growth. Lies are to darkness what truth is to light. Stand in the light of truth and not in the darkness of your lies. Don’t lie to yourself because that’s where all thoughts begin and don’t perpetuate those lies by speaking them into existence.
HAPPY NEW YEAR AND MAY THE TRUTH BE YOU….ALWAYS
When you realize that GOD IS and works in and through you, lies cease to be an option because standing on the wings of truth, you realize it is your doorway to happiness; truth is the key that unlocks confusion in your heart. Your heart will ache if you allow lies the pleasure of acting as righteous.
All of our experiences are based on the nature of our thoughts and how we play them out in our lives. If we think truth – on a deep level – then we should voice that truth which will produce goodness in our lives. The truth resonates at a high frequency in your spirit and body and cannot be denied.
Thy word is true from the beginning and every one of thy righteous judgments endureth forever – Psalm 119:160
I think the big problem is acting on the truth that we instinctively and unequivocally know. Yes, the word is true from the beginning but we have free will to mask the truth under a veil of lies. The catch is…you will never be free under that veil because you can’t see where you are and you definitely can’t see where you are heading if lies are your guide.
Nothing but goodness can come from the truth and there’s a sense of ease that comes with it - a sense of relief. In our youth we learned to lie to keep secrets of wrongdoing and to avoid punishment. That is hard to outgrow because even adults fear being punished and I think the biggest thing adults are scared of is being judged. People are going to view you from their own perspective no matter what so you may as well be viewed authentically. Only the truth will ensure you are surrounded by people of the same nature, thus eliminating the fear of punishment and judgment.
No more white lies; no more telling half but not all of the truth; no more concocting detailed lies in our mind so we can act them out later on the stage of illusion; no more fearing the truth will cripple us, when it fact, it will set us free.
Let’s start the NEW year with a NEW reason to be truthful; because without truth we stay in a vicious cycle of lies thus limiting our spiritual growth. Lies are to darkness what truth is to light. Stand in the light of truth and not in the darkness of your lies. Don’t lie to yourself because that’s where all thoughts begin and don’t perpetuate those lies by speaking them into existence.
HAPPY NEW YEAR AND MAY THE TRUTH BE YOU….ALWAYS
Wednesday, December 17, 2008
LOVE CONSCIOUSLY
We have to Love consciously from now on and not unconsciously.
I'm sure most of you have experienced this, but it's like we drive from the mall to our home and we don't know how we got there. We do most of our thinking unconsciously - not knowing how we got from point A to point B. The heart works in the same way but by the time it gets to point B, the unconscious thoughts on its travel affect how SWEET home will be when you arrive.
The heart only knows to LOVE and it knows no discretion. It's time to follow the movement of our hearts with our thoughts...consciously.
I've had Love where my thoughts of it stemmed from an unconscious fear of Love's perfection. My unconscious made limiting decisions on the infinite ecstasy of Love. If I were Loving consciously and with conscious positive thought, then nothing would have stopped my desires from manifesting with this man. God wants all of our dreams to come true; we just have to believe that our dreams are real and not figments of our imagination. Heaven is here on Earth as God permeates in and through all things.
Love is "perfect" but having unconscious thoughts of it can taint it because we tend to have NEGATIVE unconscious thoughts because they stem from our memories of the past. Memories of past Love can bring about doubt, fear, and confusion.
If we begin to have conscious thoughts of Love then we can supervise their authenticity and validate them with feelings of happiness and assurance that Love is perfect - just as God intended. If negative feelings arise say, "God is Love and Love is flowing through me as I give it and receive it abundantly."
Unconscious Love does not care about the illusions. In fact, it actually magnifies the illusions in our minds and creates fairytale versions of reality. Say love affirmations to erase and correct them.
Conscious love will stem from thoughts that your spirit has ordained and it won't rob you of energy, but instead you will gain strength from the positive reinforcements of your thoughts once you have trained them to remain positively centered.
I'm sure most of you have experienced this, but it's like we drive from the mall to our home and we don't know how we got there. We do most of our thinking unconsciously - not knowing how we got from point A to point B. The heart works in the same way but by the time it gets to point B, the unconscious thoughts on its travel affect how SWEET home will be when you arrive.
The heart only knows to LOVE and it knows no discretion. It's time to follow the movement of our hearts with our thoughts...consciously.
I've had Love where my thoughts of it stemmed from an unconscious fear of Love's perfection. My unconscious made limiting decisions on the infinite ecstasy of Love. If I were Loving consciously and with conscious positive thought, then nothing would have stopped my desires from manifesting with this man. God wants all of our dreams to come true; we just have to believe that our dreams are real and not figments of our imagination. Heaven is here on Earth as God permeates in and through all things.
Love is "perfect" but having unconscious thoughts of it can taint it because we tend to have NEGATIVE unconscious thoughts because they stem from our memories of the past. Memories of past Love can bring about doubt, fear, and confusion.
If we begin to have conscious thoughts of Love then we can supervise their authenticity and validate them with feelings of happiness and assurance that Love is perfect - just as God intended. If negative feelings arise say, "God is Love and Love is flowing through me as I give it and receive it abundantly."
Unconscious Love does not care about the illusions. In fact, it actually magnifies the illusions in our minds and creates fairytale versions of reality. Say love affirmations to erase and correct them.
Conscious love will stem from thoughts that your spirit has ordained and it won't rob you of energy, but instead you will gain strength from the positive reinforcements of your thoughts once you have trained them to remain positively centered.
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